Wednesday, March 2, 2011

When A Man Loves A Woman (Very, Very Much)

Evolution is a tricky thing. Sometimes, our social evolution actually runs contrary to our biological evolution, and we start deliberately ingesting poison in a sort of social bonding ritual.

In case you were wondering, no, we're not talking about  Native American peyote rituals or obscure cult initiations through near-death experience... well, yeah, OK, in some cases the latter holds true. No, the act in discussion is drinking potable liquids, the ingestion of alcohol, in short, boozing.

The Warped House boozes a lot, even now that we're a bit more spread out, so we need to make due with half-drunk text messages, such as the one which just passed through the space between at least some our readers ears not five minutes ago. In fact, as the first draft of this post was being typed, the message came in:

Neanderthals are totally homo. Homo since fucking habilis.

Instantly, the first draft was erased as this text bored itself into the collective consciousness. There's a band name in that!

Homo Fucking Habilis, a band that plays primitive rock and roll, a sort of primordial Chuck Berry-meets-The Clash event. They're down to earth, cynical, heavily bearded and rock like, well, it's the stone age. Most people are to thick to realize that Homo (the singer) and Habilis (the bassist) are, in fact, fucking. Alternately, we might have a Bonus BNOTD and give you:

Homo and the Sapiens, a fabulously gay rockabilly band. But that would be tasteless, and we're never tasteless, so I'm afraid you don't get a Bonus BNOTD today.

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